Accepting Responsibility

I watched with interest as Anthony Weiner accepted responsibility for his inappropriate use of social media (Facebook and Twitter). Over a period of three years he had on line relationships of a sexual nature with six women.

Although it's unfortunate that Weiner decided to engage in these inappropriate relationships, he serves as a model of how to accept responsibility for his actions. He made it clear in his news conference that his actions were wrong and that he and he alone was responsible. He did not attempt to deflect blame onto the women or any one else who might serve to distract attention from his bad behavior. He made no excuses.

All of us are guilty of mistakes, poor judgement, etc. Christians call it sin. Weiner did not use that word for his actions. Some may criticize that, but I think he was right to say that he had made mistakes, used poor judgement, and done some deeply regrettable things. The word "sin" is laden with connotations that make some people immediately close their minds to whatever is said next (perhaps Jimmy Swaggart's teary confession coming to mind).

Weiner's demeanor was one of contrite seriousness. He understands that he let people down: his wife, friends, and constituents, and is not looking for sympathy. Perhaps that's why I find my heart going out to him. He was humble, accountable, and has had a change of mind about behaviors that he originally did not believe to be as hurtful as they really are (the Greek word for repentance is "metanoia"- a change of mind.

Hopefully you don't have something like this to own up to. But if you do, Weiner offers a great example of how to respond. Own up to what you've done. Blame no one else. Be honest. It may be tempting to deflect attention off of yourself, but in the end no one is fooled. Accountability and honesty is the road back to health and trust.