Being Human

I’m writing a paper for a Leadership class I’m taking. It’s on King David –specifically his humility. This summer, I read a book entitled, Humble Leadership: Being Radically Open to God’s Guidance and Grace. At the same time, the Lectionary (which I read devotionally) was working its way through 1 & 2 Samuel. It was natural that I would read David’s story with the rubric of humility superimposed. I truly believe that David’s humility was an integral part of his effectiveness as a leader, and as a man after God’s own heart.

Three weeks ago I preached at a nearby Presbyterian church. One of the elders asked me who my favorite Bible character is. I promptly replied, “David” (though I’m not one to usually have just one favorite, so it’s subject to change). He found my choice odd, since I’m a woman and David was a scoundrel and a womanizer.

While David did have these aspects to his personality, he was also a humble man. I love that about him. When David did wrong, he admitted it, repented and moved on. He was prepared to accept from God’s hand whatever it pleased God to give him. Check out what Eugene Peterson says about David in his commentary on 1 & 2 Samuel:

“In the long history of Israel, ‘king’ is not a term that excites admiration. Except for David. David’s life is narrated as pivotal in the history of salvation…. Notice the way the story keeps us immersed in and attentive to our human condition. For it is not easy to attend to ourselves; it is more attractive to try to rise above our human condition (like the angels?); it is easier to sink below our human condition and live like animals. But ‘human is unique, and we require a long growing up to realize who we are and the way we are before God (p.137).”

I’m not a scoundrel or a man-eater (isn’t that what you call the female version of a womanizer?), but like David, I’m far from perfect. My leadership at home, church and at work is affected by my sin and brokenness. But the great news is, that I can still be a woman after God’s own heart. So can you.

God has a preference for human agency, even though he knows how sinful and broken we are. Why? 2 Corinthians 4: 7 holds the answer: “But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us.” All praise to God, who uses vessels of clay like me and you to serve Him on this earth.

Entertainment

How Sweet the Sound: The company I work for sponsored a celebration of church music in Memphis on October 6. It's pretty interesting to me that VZW decided to sponser a church choir competition, but I'm glad about it. If you have VCAST you can watch clips of the 3 winners. The choir from the medium sized congregation won from the perspective of the audience (which voted via TXT message). You can hear all six minutes of their song, and it sounds great! To view the clips go to Get It Now > Picture & Video > V CAST Video > Showcase > How Sweet the Sound-Memphis

Bella: I just read a review of the movie Bella in World Magazine. It stars Eduardo Verastegui (the Latin American version of Brad Pitt) as a Latino man with character. You don't see that too often in movies - typically they're either the bad guy (bandito) or the Don Juan (womanizer). A Latino man who wants to do the right thing and is a normal, understated guy seems interesting. The movie's produced by Metanoia Films, which aims to produce Christian themed films that are uplifting and inspiring. It's a love story, and I admit that I'm a sucker for a love story... It's only playing in 30 cities...Nashvegas is a relatively inexpensive plane ride. I may have to treat myself for my birthday...Then again, I guess I could wait for DVD.

Charlie Dodrill - playing in Statesville, NC in November. A much more reasonable BDay treat. I've never seen him live, but want to. I went to Columbia S.A. with his dad last summer. If Charlie's anything like his dad Randy, he's got to be a great guy, and his music is very fine.

Andrew Petersen & Sara Groves - in Charlotte on December 12! I'm probably most excited about this one. I saw Andrew Petersen a few years back when he traveled with Nicole Nordeman. He's a terrifically quirky, and very bright, poetic soul (right up there with Chris Rice). I've never seen Sara Groves live, but wow!!

OK, so not much is on my mind, but entertainments. Oh, well...

I Cannot, I Will Not

Happy Reformation Sunday!

"I cannot, I will not recant..." Martin Luther, tormented by an awareness of his own sinfulness rediscovered the wonder and miracle of grace for all of us. Once he knew the truth, there was no going back. Thankfully, we are made right with God by grace through faith. Knowing that changes everything. We're left to live out of gratitude rather than fear.

Grace us getting what we don't deserve. It's unmerited favor. All of us need grace. Those of us who have received it, should dispense it as generously and freely as it was given to us. Grace leaves us free to love God and our neighbor with a whole heart.

We live in a performance based world. At work perhaps, it has to be that way. But in our relationships, grace is what we need to give and receive. May God grant us hearts to love Him and others with the generous grace with which we've been loved.

And thanks, Martin Luther, for the courage of your convictions.

Simple Pleasures

Thank God for simple pleasures! The autumn is typically a time when I focus on simple pleasures. Maybe that's because the Fall is when it becomes clear to me how over-extended I am (and my kids too). October has been especially busy - the last two weeks exceptionally so. There's still been time for fun -- there's always time to have fun. But sometimes you can even over-extend yourself with fun (last weekend I carved 10 pumpkins for nieces and nephews).

This weekend's different. My sister came in from Charlotte for a visit. It's great just to sit around and talk. My daughter and I spent the day together. The weather was perfect, the clouds amazing, the moon gorgeous! I couldn't have asked for a simpler or better day.

Don't forget to savor the simple things!

Being Certain

Certainty is helpful when you're facing a tough time. My daughter is 'pledging' a high school sorority. This week she's a 'rat'. She's joining the cerebral sorority, so there's nothing too terrible (in terms of messiness or dirtiness) that she has to do, but it is testing her resolve.

Here's some of what she has to do:
- Give the current members candy.
- Dress however they tell her too - which usually involves looking silly.
- Provide 'entertainments', by which they mean songs, dances, skits, etc.
- Refrain from talking to boys at school.
- No make-up.
- Projects - like writing something on each sheet of a roll of toilet paper and each marshmallow in a bag of marshmallows.

The current members of the sorority give (and take away) points for 'rats' that either please or displease them. Apparently, there's also yelling.

I'm going to admit that I don't get it. I wouldn't subject myself to even this mild (by comparison) initiation. Girls who like you ask you to join their club and then mistreat you for a week... Somehow, my daughter is convinced that it's worth it.

But what I do get is that there are many things that we decide to do - we're certain of - that require us to endure hardship. If you're a Christian, discipleship will sometimes lead down roads that you probably wouldn't choose for yourself. Though I'm not sure that my daughter's sorority experience will be worth the trouble in the end, I'm certain than whatever discipleship requires will be.

The Girl in the Other Room*

When I was a little girl, I would sometimes look into the mirror - not at myself per se - but into the other room. The girl (myself) would be the girl in the other room. It was a room where everything was 'backward' or 'opposite'. I would imagine what life was like in that room. How was it different? In a similar way, sometimes I would lie on my back and imagine what it would be like if the ceiling was the floor. What would that be like? It would still be my house, just different.

Do you ever have dreams about houses? I do, fairly frequently. Psychologists will tell you that in dreams, houses (as well as cars ) are metaphors for the self. Sometimes I dream that I'm in my house - only there are rooms I didn't realize were there. Usually, they're really fantastic rooms - rooms that I'd like to live in all the time, if only I could remember how to get there... I wonder if these dreams are related to the 'other room' in the mirror.

I suspect that there is one way that they're related. We all know on some level (Christians in a very specific way) that there is more to life and reality than meets the eye. There's also more to us than appearances suggest. The truth is, there are many 'other rooms' where things are even more 'real' than the rooms we normally inhabit. Sometimes (like in our dreams or imaginations) we get an inkling of some part of that reality. Occasionally, God chooses to give us a glimpse of His Kingdom. Sometime God chooses to give us a glimpse of ourselves as we really are - or are becoming. Either way it's a glimpse of glory.

A God Sized Adventure

Any good story - even a good love story (maybe especially a love story) - has an element of adventure in it. My sister is living that kind of adventure right now. It's a great story, really.

She became reacquainted with a man she dated (and broke up with) 20 years ago. The truth is, she always wondered if she missed Mr. Right - by breaking off her relationship with Vince the Prince (we've always called him that - and he is, a prince of a guy). They got married almost two years ago. That's the romantic part.

The adventure part is that he has 5 kids that he has custody of. After the second set of twins - that's right - 2 sets of twins - his first wife decided that she didn't want to be married any more, or be responsible for raising 5 kids. When the marriage broke up the youngest twins were still in diapers. Vince entered survival mode. He quit work to take care of his kids - something few men would do. Still, it was survival mode.

Some of the finer points, like well balanced meals and sitting together at the dinner table went by the wayside. It had to. It's also difficult to have quality time with 5 kids when you're the only stable influence in their lives. But they made it through. God brought my sis and Vince the Prince together. Now there are two adults in the house, and truly, no one is better suited to love Vince and the kids than my sister.

She has the patience of Job. She listens - really listens. She doesn't like to cook but she does it anyway so that the kids will learn to eat well-balanced meals. She's bringing the finer points back into their lives. But it's slow going. Today my sister was tired and frustrated. She's an introvert who needs time alone to recharge her batteries, and today her batteries were running low.

Though it's hard going sometimes, this God-sized adventure is making a profound difference in the lives of 6 people for sure. Those 6 influence the lives of others, and on and on... So, my sweet sister, hang in there. Keep at it. Beyond, behind, and below the fatigue and frustration there is glory.

Always, Joyce

Welcome to the World

Happy Birthday James! Welcome to the world. Welcome to the family! We've been waiting for your arrival with lots of anticipation. You're a big 'un - 10 lbs 10 ozs! I'm sure your mom is worn out. I wish I could be there to see you tonight, but when I get home Wednesday, your house will be my first stop!

You're a lucky young man. Your parents are loving, bright people who'll do their best by you. Your aunts and uncles (if I do say so myself) are lots of fun! So are your cousins. You've been born into a close family that loves to have fun. We're going to have a great time getting to know you!
With much love,
Tia Alegria (Aunt Joyce)

My Father Was a Wandering Aramean

"My father was a wandering Aramean, and he went down into Egypt with a few people and sojourned there ...(Deut 26:5)" Not really. Actually, my father is a Cuban doctor who came to the USA and sojourned. His father immigrated from Spain to Cuba and then to the USA and sojourned here. Though my father assimilated very well, my grandfather never learned to speak English (and he lived in Miami over 20 years). He always felt himself an alien here.

In many ways it's sad that Abuelo never felt at home in the USA. But it's also understandable. He left a life that he loved, land that he owned, a business that he ran. For him (as well as countless other Cubans), the promised land was 90 miles away, but may as well have been on the moon. He was not a man of faith. Otherwise, perhaps his time of sojourning here could have been different.

My grandfather stands in stark contrast to my great grandmother Luz Divina ("Divine Light" a.k.a Tita). Tita was a woman of faith - and she lived up to her name in every way. She was a Pentecostal, and once she came to the USA, my grandparents (who did not approve of her Pentecostalism) didn't allow her to go to church. I remember visiting once, and coming upon Tita standing on the balcony looking out. She was wearing a beatific expression, and it was clear that she was communing with the Almighty. She was a "wandering Aramean" but she was OK with it. She knew that she was a stranger and alien on a far deeper level than being an old Cuban woman in the USA at the end of her life.

I'm related to Luz Divina by more than simply blood (though I'm deeply honored to share that too). I am also a "wandering Aramean" sojourning here as a stranger and alien. And for me too, it's OK. In fact, it's better than OK, it's an adventure. And I love adventure.

Individualism & Interrelatedness

I'm reading a book entitled Shame and Honor in the Book of Esther. In it, Tim Laniak, the author, points out that the Japanese word for "myself" is jibun, which means "my part", i.e. of the larger whole. It's an interesting insight for a person with a Western perspective.

In the West (especially the USA - the land of the rugged individualist), we emphasize the individual - his or her life, accomplishments, and rights. In the East that's not the case. The book I'm reading concerns the Ancient Near East, but many of the constructs still hold true in the Middle East as well as the Far East today.

We're often horrified by what those in the East will do to satisfy their notions of shame and honor as well as their apparent (by our Western standards) disregard for the individual. We cannot imagine that they would have anything to teach us. But I wonder...

Certainly, suicide bombers are pretty scary - and a result of the Eastern disregard for the individual. But anything when taken to extremes is unhealthy - even individualism.

For Christians, it's really not an option. 1 Corinthians makes our interrelatedness clear with the analogy of the body. What I do has an effect on the whole. Not only does it affect the whole, however, my part only makes sense in the context of the whole. For an American (rugged individualist) born into the "me generation" it's a thought that makes me go, hmmmm....

On Politics and Disillusionment

A young man running for the VA House of Delegates came to my door this evening to ask for my vote. He had a brochure in his hand that outlined his (I guess the word is) "platform". He asked me if I was aware of the upcoming election - who the candidates were, etc. I had to admit that, though I knew there was an upcoming election (it's almost November after all),that I did not know who was running or what they considered the "issues" to be.

He was a nice fellow - seemed very earnest. We had a very civil - even friendly conversation, even though he knew that I was not of his political party. His brochure gave some very general statements about what he would do if elected. I told him that I would be more likely to vote for him if along with those general objectives, that he would include some specific action items.

He said, "What do you mean?" I explained that as a business woman, I have objectives that I'm required to meet. It's not enough, however, for me to simply say that I'm going to meet or exceed them. I have to provide a plan - and sometimes a contingency plan explaining how I'm going to meet the objectives.

That's one of the things about politics generally that bothers me. There's plenty of talk about what needs to be done, but not a lot of disclosure about how those things will be accomplished. I don't get the sense that very much actually does get accomplished - though I'm willing to admit that I may be ignorant on that front.

Another problem I have is the question of motivation. I believe that the fellow who knocked on my door this evening truly wants to make a difference. Perhaps most - maybe all- politicians begin this way. I suspect, however, that once someone decides to become a career politician, that their motivation changes - at least to some degree.

I would describe myself as fairly apolitical. I'm not against politics per se, but find it hard to believe that any important answers are found in government. Maybe I'm a product of my generation. Nixon was impeached during my formative years. President Reagan was a brief 8 year period when I believed that politics could provide answers to important problems. Don't get me wrong, I am thankful for the USA and the freedom I enjoy. But I don't believe that God is terribly invested in our form of government - including our freedom.

I will do my civic duty and vote as responsibly as I can. I always do. However, it'll be as one choosing the lesser of two evils, rather than a great good. I'll also work for justice and peace as a private citizen - in the sphere in which I have influence - inviting God to do His work, expanding His Kingdom and His agenda in me and through me.

The Main Thing is to Keep the Main Thing the Main Thing

Steven Covey came up with that simple yet brilliant statement. The main thing is to keep the main thing the main thing. It seems to be easier said than done for most of us - myself included.

We know it when we see it. Jesus' life was marked by a relentless focus on keeping the main thing the main thing. It kept him continually at odds with the religious leaders of his day who would rather ride hobby horses than truly follow the Living God. Mother Teresa and Gandhi also seemed to be able to keep the main thing primary in their lives.

More often than not, keeping the main thing the main thing leads to conflict. Folks are more comfortable with peripheral things. They're easier to do and easier to comprehend. They're also more about us and less about - well, the main thing. Maybe that's the crux of the matter.

At the deepest level - en lo mas hondo de mi ser - in my marrow - I want the focus of my life and energies to be on the Main Thing.

UK and Diana Krall

Thursday night I was watching theUniversity of KY vs. South Carolina and talking to my mom on the phone. I noticed that there were a lot of Kentucky fans in South Carolina and commented to my mom that it seemed like a long way to travel. She responded, "It doesn't seem any farther than Nashville is from South Central VA."

She's referring to my trip to Nashvegas to see Diana Krall in concert this summer. Yeah, and I drove. To mom (obviously), that seemed a bit extreme. The thing is, I had an extreme desire to see Diana Krall in concert- I've wanted to see her live for years. The truth is, I probably would have traveled farther than Nashville.

I guess it's a matter of priorities. I'm not a KY or a SC fan, I just wanted to watch some football. I probably would travel a fair distance to see the Steelers play (and regularly drive to see them when they're in Charlotte). Folks are willing to go the distance for whatever's important to them.

Christine Dente sings a song entitiled How Far, How Much where the question is posed, "How far would I go to show I love you so, I wonder?" I think it's an excellent question to ask. The "you" in this particular song is God. For me, God is priority #1 and the question is apt.

God in Christ went the distance for me (and you too) -- all the way to the cross. He willingly laid down his life. How far would I go to show I love Him so?

Smelly Music?

In some ways, music is like a smell.

They say that the sense of smell is linked in some very basic way to memory. Certain odors will prompt the memory of an event. For instance, perfumes may remind you of certain people. Smells can also evoke emotions, positive or negative that relate to our memories of events. Yesterday, I was taking a walk and smelled a cigar. Not a malodorous, cheap cigar, but a fairly decent one. The smell of good cigars reminds me of my father. I like the smell. It reminds me of the feeling of safety and security I had as a child.

Music does the same sort of thing. I've got Sirius radio, and love the 70's station. There's just nothing like music from the 70's, is there? My kids are amazed that I seem to know every song. Many of those songs carry memories. Many more evoke feelings: the feeling of the world opening up in new and exciting ways, feelings of confidence (and sometimes of insecurity), feelings of love - or rejection. Overwhelmingly, though music from this era makes me feel great.

It's an amazing power, isn't it? The power of words and music together forming part of the framework of someone's life?

The sky is beautiful at this time of year. Whether it's the moon at night or the clouds during the day. The sky is dramatic in the Fall. Sunrise and sunset are equally lovely. This morning there was a rainbow shooting up in the west.

My daughter (adjusting to her 1st year of high school) said, "Maybe the rainbow's a sign that I'm going to have a good day." Wouldn't it great if we could see a sign in the sky and know with certainty that it portends a good day!

Though we can't tell by rainbows or stars or anything else we see on our way to work or school that things are going to go our way, we can know that God is with us. And as the Creator of ALL, he'll guide us through every circumstance "good" or "bad"and use it all as a means of guiding our lives and shaping our hearts.

Did You Know

Did you know:

- In Louisiana biting someone with your natural teeth is "simple assault" but biting someone with your false teeth is "aggravated assault"?

- The banana is the world's largest herb?

-Unlike love and warranties, pollen actually does last forever?

-According to marine biologists, whale songs are said to rhyme?

- A group of tigers is known collectively as a "streak".

He's Feelin' So Fly

I had a conversation with my friend Patrick today. I've known Patrick for about 8 years. We're work buddies. We've shared lots of life over the years we've been friends. I've cried at his dad's funeral and at his wedding. We've fought together in the trenches at work. Patrick is an amazing fellow and an inspirational follower of Jesus Christ.

A few weeks ago Patrick blew out his ACL playing basketball. To fully understand the impact of something like this, you need to know that "Basketball jones, I got a basketball jones, I got a basketball jones oh baby oooheeooh" was written about him.

But rather than be devastated and drown in self-pity, Patrick decided to discover what God had for him. He worked hard in physical therapy before surgery, came through surgery like a champ, and now is in physical therapy again - working hard to regain mobility. Patrick's doing his part, and God is faithfully doing His.

I asked him how he's doing today and he said:

- "God is encouraging me as I'm praising Him."
- "I feel so triumphant, so liberated, and I will never forget leaning my crutch up against the wall and walking away from it. It has to be a taste of what those people that Jesus healed felt like."
- "If I had wings I could fly."

It puts me in mind of Toby Mac's song "Feelin' So Fly":
There ain't a day that goes by
That I'm not singing Your praise
There ain't a day that goes by
That I'm not completely amazed
A supernatural high
Your love is simply insane
You got me feeling so fly

It's amazing how God blesses beyond our thoughts or expectations in all things - if only we have eyes to see, ears to hear, and hearts to understand.

On the Closing of a Church

It's pretty darn sad when a church closes its doors. Yesterday I attended the final service of a small Presbyterian church in my town. It began as a mission of a larger Presbyterian church, planted in a mill neighborhood in 1919. Ideally, the church would have been there as a beacon of hope and proclaimer of grace. Maybe it was.

Over the years the neighborhood changed, as neighborhoods are wont to do. It became integrated, perhaps even predominately black. The congregation did not change. It did not integrate. Why? I picked up one of the visitors cards from the pew yesterday. It originated from the 60s, and depicts clean cut smiling folks - women in hats and gloves. The families on the visitor card do not reflect the demographic of the neighborhood.

I attend the largest Presbyterian church in town. We once boasted a congregation of close to 1,000. I think there may be 300-400 on the church rolls today. Our church is located near downtown. In our case too, the demographics of the church do not match the demographics of the neighborhood. The church does reach out to the neighborhood, serving lunch every Saturday (the only day of the week the week the Salvation Army does not offer a meal). But in worship on Sunday morning, most of the faces are white.

I sit on the session of the church, and the decline in membership is a concern. I can imagine session meeting from the church that just closed sounding similar. How much of a concern is it truly? Are we willing to change the demographics of the church? Are we willing to integrate? How 'bout changing worship, sharing power, opening up to CHANGE?

Part of God's great charm is that he always calls us into a wider place. But getting there means being open to change, discomfort, and pain. The alternative is a long, slow death. May God grant us all the grace to follow where his Holy Spirit leads.